After the fourth snow shoveling of the day, my boots were soaked and I still had a car to dig out, a walkway to re-shovel and a rescue mission for a couple beers I’d stashed in the snow in case I got thirsty and the Saint Bernard with the collar full of booze couldn’t make it down my block. “Just wear my boots” the wife said “they are warm.”
Oh to chuckle! “Those are women’s boots,” I responded. “That’s adorable though.” Honest to God, I almost patted her on the head. That move might have gotten me lost in the snow with those bottles of suds. After a few minutes of internal debate (broken up by curses towards the heavens and Mother Nature) I figured “Eh, what the hell, who was going to see my feet anyway? Other poor schmucks shoveling their walks? Big deal.” Though barely fitting (they were women’s boots after all) they did keep my tootsies warm and dry.
Since that day, usually only during snow storms, I’ve said aloud my interesting in purchasing Ugg boots. For men. In a size larger than “teacup.” I just couldn’t get out of my mind the stigma of the brand being associated with women. Then, flipping through a men’s magazine, Tom Terrific appeared like a snow plow burying my male ego under mounds of snow.
Well if it’s good enough for Tom Terrific, it’s good enough for this fella. I decided to ease myself into the Ugg family. I couldn’t just jump right up to mother of all boots. I had to put in some time with her daughters before making a move. (Yup, just compared sleeping with a woman’s mother to buying shoes. Breaking ground here.) So I got the Mens Roxford sneakers. Thus far, the purchase has been a success. The sneakers are comfortable and look pretty good with a pair of jeans or even work khakis. Even got a few compliments.
Another winter is approaching and I’m winter bootless thus far. It might be time to start making the move to the matriarch of the Ugg family. MILF alert. Man Interested in Ladies Footwear.